Why I Love Angry, Make-Up Sex

Getting into fights with my partner isn’t the most fun thing in the world, but sometimes it does lead to something very, very fun — make-up sex.

The Benefits of Make-Up Sex After a Fight

When you argue and fight, tension builds up between you two, and even after everything is mostly smoothed out, sometimes tension remains.

To me, there’s no better way to get that tension out and clear the air like a good, hard fucking.

I’m not a very confrontational person at all, it actually scares the shit out of me, so when I get into fights or arguments with my partners I often feel very doom and gloomy like the end is near, so connecting sexually after a fight is a good thing for sure…

The Appeal of Angry, Dominant Sex for Some Women

But sometimes it’s just a little better when it’s angry, primal, and every motion and act comes from an emotion inside you that you need to get out.

Sometimes I want my man to just punish me.

I want the manliness of my man to come out in full force, I want to be taken and roughed up.

I like my hair pulled, I love spankings, but most of all when it comes to make up sex, I just want my partner to pound into me hard and fast so we can use each other until we are finished.

There doesn’t seem to be anything feministic about it.

Sometimes I practically want to be dragged, cave man style into the bedroom, thrown down and dirty fucked by a man who takes all the control into his own hands.

This is interesting for me, because usually I like to take the lead in the bedroom, but for some reason when it comes to make-up sex I like to be fully ravaged and dominated.

I like the man on top, pushing my legs apart and shoving himself into me while he whispers in my ear what a bad, bad girl I am…

The spontaneity of make-up sex is an additional turn on.

You don’t always know when you’re going to get into a tiff that needs some make-up sex, but when it happens it usually happens fast, hot hot passion coming out of nowhere.

I actually have a fantasy about this — about being in the throes of a fight with my partner but then suddenly he comes at me and puts his mouth over mine to shut me up, wrestles me to the floor and tears my panties down before shoving himself into me, fast and hard.

He pulls at my hair, bites at my nipples, holds me down and doesn’t let me up…and giving in to that sort of almost abusive, angry sex actually feels really good to me.

Once in a while, in times like these, it’s nice to leave my own dominance at the door and let someone else take charge of the situation.

This isn’t to say you can’t have hard, angry, male-dominated sex without fighting.

Some women like to be ravaged and “punished” by their lovers all the time whether they are fighting or not.

But for me, it’s a cathartic thing.

The Cathartic Release of Tension Through Make-Up Sex

It’s pounding out all the remaining bad emotions (literally, pounding them right away!) and orgasming my way into forgiveness and relief.

The great thing is, you’re helping to fix yourself while you mend your relationship a little bit after that fight, so it’s sort of a win/win for both partners in the scenario.

Because, really, who doesn’t come out of some good make-up sex not feeling better about their situation?

Conclusion

Are you tired of swiping endlessly on dating apps? It’s time to try one of the best escort sites in Singapore. Geylang666.net is ready to help you find your perfect match based on your interests, preferences, and location. Join now and discover the exciting sex night!

Sex With Strangers Is Good for You

The term one-night stand is filled with negative connotations. Think about it. Alcohol. Bad judgment. Spontaneous sex. Maybe drugs. Possible regret with a drop of anxiety about which STDs you might’ve caught. Pregnancy scares. It’s everything our parents used to say.

But what if I told you that was a myth? What if some meaningless sex with strangers was just what you needed to start recovering from a bad breakup? Take the red pill. Come with me.

The Benefits of Casual Sex

Nobody plans a one-night stand, or at least not that I know of. That’s what makes them so great. It’s like finding a $20 on the sidewalk, except it also gives you a huge boost in your self-esteem area.

But that first one-night stand showed me what I’d been looking for the whole time: fun sex.

Not meaningless sex, exactly. But less serious. Just entertainment.

The Thrill and Adventure of a One-Night Stand

How did my one-night stand begin? At a conference, with me just standing at a crosswalk one morning on my way to a panel. He walked up, messing with his name badge. His eyes flashed when he saw me. Yeah, handsome.

It turned out we were going to the same panel. Or maybe he lied: “Oh, I love Nabokov! I was on my way there, too.” But he knew enough to make the lie convincing. I mean, he’d even read Pnin.

We sat together. We had lunch together, too, and exchanged numbers. At first, I thought maybe we’d just become conference buddies. But then some sassy texts showed up — not creepy, just playful. Around 5 p.m., he said we should check out this sushi place. That turned into coffee and then drinks with some other grad students. About halfway through a cocktail party, he pulled me off into a back room, where we started kissing.

You’re not supposed to behave like that in academia, at least not in public. We both knew better. People who make out in public at conferences don’t get jobs. They become the subjects of gossip and dirty stories.

The risk made those lips taste even better.

The other thing? He was married. Don’t worry, he told me first — while slipping an arm around my waist. He almost whispered it. They were getting separated. In my old life, that would’ve made me puke. But that night, it made me feel sexy.

What was I to him? A harmless fuck? A treat after a rough year? Yeah, that’s it. I was a treat. That felt nice for a change.

A one-night stand has plenty of meaning. It means someone wants you, bad. So bad they can’t wait. They want to fuck you now. You feel a sense of urgency and adventure. It’s almost like a baptism.

Before that, I’d only kissed someone on a first date once and no fucking until a third date. But that night, I figured common sense and good judgment hadn’t gotten me anywhere so far. Might as well try some mistakes. So we whisked onto the elevator and up to his room.

After guiding himself in, he stopped. “Just making sure… You know this is a one-time thing, right?

“Shut up and fuck me.”

We split a bagel at Starbucks the next morning. We teased each other and flirted. But neither of us felt the twinge of regret or hangover headache that’s supposed to come later. We even remembered each other’s names. Later that day, he texted me for another night out. So it was more like a two-time thing. Actually, three or four times.

Smart Casual Sex

Meaningless sex is great when you are smart about it.

It turned out that we kinda liked each other, even apart from the sex. He was funny, told interesting stories, and we got along well. Sure, we were using each other for sex. But that didn’t make us evil or empty. We entered into the contract with our eyes open, and a sense of mutual respect. He wanted out of his marriage, and I needed my confidence and dignity restored. Not a bad deal for either of us.

Everyone talks about how much meaningless sex degrades you. That’s just not always true. Meaningless sex doesn’t hurt people. People hurt people.

Sadly, none of my later flings lived up to that first one. The next one lied about his age by about 12 years. After that, I mistakenly almost fucked a cocaine addict. And after that, I cooled off and returned to monogamy. But I came back with a new sense of strength and self-awareness.

Conclusion

So my advice? If you’re single, go sex with strangers. You might be surprised what happens. Come on try the best sex dating on Geylang666.

How to Find People to Have a Threesome With

Log onto any dating app these days, and as you’re swiping through, you’re bound to happen across a couple or two who are “looking for a third.” I used to think this was only something I’d run into on Feeld, a dating app designed for more open relationship styles, but even on apps like Tinder, couples are looking for threesomes or triads or somewhere in between. Everyone seems to want a threesome.

This is often referred to as unicorn hunting, and it’s gotten a lot of negative attention lately. Unfortunately, when a couple is looking for someone to have a threesome (or more) with, they don’t always go about it in the most ethical way. The wants and needs of the third in the dynamic aren’t always considered the way they should be, and that’s definitely a problem.

Wanting to have a threesome isn’t bad — but there are right and wrong ways to go about it. I’ve talked to lots of people who have expressed that they’d love to have a threesome eventually, but they aren’t sure where to start. They have no idea how they’d go about finding the perfect threesome dynamic, and I think that problem has stumped a lot of people.

Whether you’re a couple looking to try group sex together (for the right reasons, I hope) or a single person who would love to give a threesome a try, there are ethical, respectful ways to find other people who are willing to go there with you, and all of them involve being upfront and honest about your intentions.

Friends

Sometimes, you don’t actually have to look very far to find what you’re looking for, and that can apply to threesomes. “But none of my friends are that sexually adventurous/would be willing to go there with me,” you might be saying to yourself right now. That’s entirely possible, but also, have you asked them? Do you know that for sure?

If you and your friends have that level of comfort and trust, try bringing up the subject in a casual, non-pushy way and see what they say. Their reactions may surprise you.

Pros: Having a threesome with a friend as opposed to a stranger brings a level of comfort to the dynamic. You already know them and have established trust. It can make the whole process a little easier to navigate.

Cons: Whenever sex is involved, there’s always the chance that it could make things awkward or even ruin a friendship if you’re not practicing effective communication, making sure everyone’s expectations are aligned, and respecting each other’s boundaries. Before going there with your friends, you definitely need to make sure everyone’s cards are on the table.

Dates

If you’re someone who’s casually dating or practicing some form of non-monogamy, put some feelers out and see if the people you’re seeing also have an interest in pursuing a threesome. Obviously, just because three people are all interested in having a threesome doesn’t mean that dynamic will definitely work out, but still, you never know. The people you’re dating might also have people that they’re dating who could be interested, too. It’s a pool worth exploring.

Pros: The people you’re seeing are aware that you’re seeing multiple people, so broaching the subject of a threesome isn’t a huge stretch. Plus, since these are people you’re dating or people they’re dating, you know there’s attraction and chemistry happening in at least some direction, so it might be easier to find a dynamic that works.

Cons: The people you’re dating might not be into each other, or vice versa. That’s always a possibility in any scenario, though. Other than that, I can’t think of any real cons. In my opinion, this is a pretty solid option to pursue.

Sex parties

It might sound silly to look for people to have threesomes with at a sex party, which is already a group sex event. Why try to pursue a threesome if you’re having an orgy? Each kind of group sex has different things to offer, though, so just because you’re getting to experience going to a sex party doesn’t mean you’ll suddenly no longer have any desire to have a threesome. Every sexual experience is unique.

Everyone comes to sex parties for different reasons. In general, though, it’s a safe assumption that most people there have at least some kind of interest in group sex. That being said, if you hit it off with some people, exchange contact info and see where it goes. They may be down for all kinds of different experiences going forward, including threesomes.

Pros: Sex parties are group sex situations, so talking about threesomes with people you meet there should come pretty naturally and might not feel as taboo as in other situations. You’re also potentially able to get the feeling for if a threesome dynamic will work or not chemistry-wise since there’s already group sex happening.

Cons: It might feel difficult for some people to make connections that extend outside of the party. Also, it might be a little intimidating or feel silly to talk about having a threesome at a future time when there’s already group sex happening in the moment. Don’t stress too much about it though. If it feels natural, bring it up. Sex parties are usually pretty open, non-judgemental spaces, after all.

Dating apps

Currently, I think dating apps are the main way that people are searching for threesomes or triads or any kind of “third” situation. So much of the time, it’s not executed well. Sometimes just one person in the couple will swipe on their personal profile and then tell people after they’ve matched what they’re actually looking for. Sometimes a couple shares a profile but still isn’t upfront with their matches about what they’re actually looking for. Sometimes there’s a power struggle between the couple that ends up affecting the third person. It can definitely be a bit of a mess.

It doesn’t have to be though. Dating apps can be a perfectly fine place to look for people to have a threesome with if that’s something you’re looking for. When I swipe through Feeld, I sometimes come across a single person who will say something on their profile like, “I would be down to have a threesome and I have a friend who might be interested if you’d be into that, if not that’s ok, too.” It lets people know that’s something they’d be open to and then gives them the space to decide for themselves. That’s how you do it.

If a couple is swiping together, as long as they’re completely upfront about what they’re looking for and don’t enact a bait and switch situation, I don’t think there’s anything wrong with it. The key is transparency. Let people know exactly what you’re looking for upfront. I think couples are sometimes afraid to be honest because they’re worried they won’t get any matches — but that’s better than matching with people on the basis of a lie.

Even if ultimately what you’re looking for on a dating app is a possible threesome, I think the key is to be open to all different possibilities and connections. Even if someone turns out not to be a great match for a threesome, they could be a great match for something else. Stay honest and open. That’s the key.

Pros: There’s a huge pool of people on dating apps, so statistically, there’s a higher chance that you’ll find someone whose wants and desires are aligned with yours.

Cons: There are definitely a lot of people who don’t go about using dating apps to find threesomes the right way, so a lot of people may be deterred from giving you a chance because of their own bad experiences. Don’t let that tempt you into dishonesty though. Stay transparent, always.

Spontaneously

I know, I know. Spontaneous, spur-of-the-moment threesomes feel like a myth. Being out and about somewhere and you and two other people all hit it off and decide to have a threesome together right away? That’s the dream, and it feels like that’s exactly how it’ll stay. It is possible though. You could find yourself in a situation where everything is clicking, you’re able to communicate about it effectively, and it happens. Is it the most likely situation for a threesome? No, probably not. I had to throw it in here though because frankly, you just never know.

Pros: Spontaneous can be fun and exciting. You don’t know it’s going to happen beforehand so there’s less time for anxiety to build up about it. Plus, it’s really hot. Duh.

Cons: While spontaneous can be fun, it also means there’s less planning involved, which honestly, can be kind of crucial for successful threesomes.

It’s ok to want to have a threesome. Our sexual desires are valid. However, we shouldn’t throw ethics out the window just to try and make them happen. If there’s something we want sexually, we should go about it in a safe, communicative, transparent way, and this should apply to looking for partners for a threesome, too.

I know threesomes can sometimes feel like an impossible dream, but they’re not. You can have that desire fulfilled. Just be honest and respectful, and you might be surprised with what you can achieve.

Conclusion

Are you struggling to find the people to have threesome with you? Don’t worry, we can help. With advanced search filters, we’ve got everything you need to make meaningful connections with people who share your interests, So why not take a chance on love and visit our Geylang666 today?

A Russian Doll in China: My Escorting Tips – Part 1

Escorting can be a lonely and dangerous choice of career, especially when you are new, it’s important that you have some guidance and advice from those with experience. So I would like to share some of the escorting tips and good advice which I have learned and received, along my journey as an escort.
Firstly, I want to say that I am not ashamed of my choice of work and you should never be, either. While it’s not a job I would advise to everyone (we are all different), I enjoy what I do for many reasons. I get to meet a lot of interesting clients, many of whom go on to become regulars, and some I would now regard as good friends. I also have the ability to travel and I am in total control of when, where, and how I work. However, let’s not pretend it’s all a bed of roses, anyone escorting, regardless of age or gender, can find themselves in dangerous and risky situations, often vulnerable and unsure of who to trust. It’s essential that you must learn fast and limit the risks and dangers you face.

How I arrived in Hong Kong..

I originally come from the Far East of Russia, but I am now a resident of Hong Kong. I first came to Hong Kong in 2000, I was then a young tourist, visiting this beautiful city with my mom. In our hotel lobby I was fascinated by the pianist who played beautiful jazz music, and during one of my secret smoking trips behind the back of the hotel fountain (where I would hide from my mom), we met and spoke. During this brief meeting we exchanged contact details (at the time yahoo messenger was a popular way to keep in contact), and over the following year we kept in touch, talking almost daily. He would often play the piano over the phone for me and we would talk for hours. I soon found myself falling in love.
Despite being 20 years my senior, I didn’t hesitate to leave my family and homeland when he invited me to come live with him in Hong Kong. Once I arrived, things moved quickly, and soon after that, we married. We endured a long and adventurous relationship, with good times and bad times, and few regrets. He always said that I kept him young, but I believed it was the vibrant and electrifying city of Hong Kong which kept us both full of youth and ambition.
Today, I live in a small fishing village on the edge of Hong Kong. Here you won’t find so many foreigners, it’s home to 40,000 locals, surrounded by the South China Sea. Despite being so close to one of the world’s most modern and thrilling cities, here I am surrounded by nature (a balance I find truly amazing). I live with my dog and love growing my own organic vegetables. I spend a lot of time meditating and doing yoga, and taking care of my body, mind, and soul. I love being closely connected to the natural world, and one of my favourite things is feeding and caring for a pack of wild dogs which live in the forest by my home.
Why do I tell you all of this? I think the first piece of advice I must give is to be yourself and never compromise on who you are and what makes you feel passionate about life. If escorting is a career you choose, don’t let it define who you are, but rather, use it to open up more options and opportunities, and build the life you want.

Always take pride in your hygiene

Regardless of whether you are working as a companion or not, I think you should always take pride in how you look and act. My mom taught me from a young age that hygiene and manners were always free, and I think that philosophy is even more important to follow when your work brings you very up close and intimate with others. For that reason I never accept bookings which don’t allow me enough time to be washed and fully prepared.
While you should always take responsibility for having great hygiene and cleanliness, that also affords you the right to expect the same of others, and you should refuse or cancel bookings where you don’t feel your client is clean or hygienic. When a client doesn’t respect their own body it’s very unlikely that they will respect yours.
There are also likely to be times when you find yourself leaving a client without having enough time to clean and shower, or you just don’t feel so minty fresh when exiting their location! So it’s important to also carry a basic hygiene kit with you at all times. For me this includes:
  • Feminine wipes
  • Hand sanitizer
  • Shower gel
  • Toothbrush and toothpaste
  • Mouthwash
  • Breath mints
  • Deodorant/perfume
  • Sun cream
  • Hairbrush
Depending on your personal routine, there may be other must-have items you need, and for most of these items you should be able to find ‘mini’ or travel-sized versions. Carrying such items has saved me from feeling uncomfortable many more times than I can remember.

Know and respect your emotions

While you should never accept a booking when you are not physically prepared, it’s also important to know and respect your mental health, and not take on bookings when you don’t feel mentally ready.
If you are feeling down, tired, or in a bad mood for any reason, I would always recommend to refuse bookings, especially when with someone you don’t know. When you accept a booking you are entering into an unknown situation where you need to be fully alert and always able to keep good and polite manners – as you will occasionally need to diffuse volatile and uncomfortable moments.

Keep a regular skin care routine

We are all fighting aging and in this line of work you will feel even more pressure to stay looking young and desirable. I take great pride in the fact people mistake me for being much younger than I am, and while I said that the city of Hong Kong helps keep me feeling so young, I also have to give a huge amount of credit to keeping a strict and regular skin care routine.
Depending on your skin type, you may have a different set of magic lotions and creams that you feel work best for you, but the important thing is to keep that routine very strict and don’t skip it even when you travel or feel tired (treat it as important as cleaning your teeth before bed, or putting on your shoes before leaving the house).
My personal secret lotion is virgin coconut oil from the Philippines. No matter what time of year, what I am doing, or where I am, I always have some with me and it’s become an important part of my daily hair, nail, and skin care routine, day and night.

Have someone you can share your experiences and feelings with

If you are lucky you already have good friends, or close family who know what you do and are supportive. There are several important benefits of having someone you can talk to about. One of them is having someone know where and when you are working, and having them check up on you during and after a booking. I know many escorts use a ‘buddy system’ where they inform each other when and where their bookings are, and then let each other know when a booking is complete and that they are safe.
Another important reason for having someone you can talk to, is having an outlet and someone who will listen. Escorting can be a very emotional job, you are spending so much time being intimate with others, and while in time you do learn to manage your emotions better, we all suffer from days when we feel more fragile. As an escort you will benefit from having a friend or trusted person who you can talk to if you ever feel low.
If you really don’t have any friends or family who you can talk to about what you do, consider contacting a local support group. I am lucky and have a good personal support network so I don’t have experience with this, but I have heard good things about the Empower Foundation in Thailand, and the Renew Foundation in Philippines. These support networks are there to help support existing escorts, but also to assist those who find themselves wanting to get out of escorting, or for those who are victims of trafficking and forced work.

Resist the temptation of drug and alcohol abuse

Personally, I do not do drugs or abuse alcohol, but I also never judge those who do. However, I have sadly seen many escorts who start as occasional users (usually as a means to work longer hours or to please a good paying client), who soon find themselves using hard drugs daily. The difference between being an occasional drug user and being an addict seems a very delicate line to tread, especially in this type of work, and it seems very easy to lose control of which side of the line you are on.
Escorting is a rare job where you are regularly around alcohol and drugs, and will often find yourself being offered free drugs and excess alcohol. In some situations you will find clients who insist that you take drugs with them, even offering to pay you more if you indulge. It’s very important to resist such temptations.
It’s easy to be tempted to try something once, or break your personal rules and limits when there is a financial gain, but it’s an extremely dangerous game to play. You must build a strong personal code regarding drugs and alcohol, and stick to it, no matter what. We only know our true limits and breaking points once they are passed.

Give a lot of importance to your sleep

Do not underestimate the power and importance of sleep. For me, sleep is one of the keys to keeping mentally positive and stable. As an escort, you are commiting to a lifestyle that predominantly takes place at night and often with very irregular working hours, so that can make it hard to keep healthy sleeping patterns. I think the most important thing is to have a regular sleeping time, whether that be going to bed at midnight, 2am, 5am, even 8am, and making sure you spend at least 7-8 hours sleeping every day. Your body will greatly reward you if you give it regular sleeping time and hours.
Personally I believe it’s best if you can maximise the hours of daylight you can get, for your best mental health. If you find that you need to be working from 10pm until 6am, I would consider adopting the Spanish style of sleeping 5-6 hours, and then having a 2-3 hour siesta sleep before starting work. It’s not something I personally do as I try to not work so late at night, but for me, sleeping 7am to midday, and again 6pm to 9pm, is better than sleeping 6am through to mid afternoon, and seeing very little sunlight.
Important! Sleep should always mean sleep. Laying in bed looking at your phone is not rest, it’s anti-rest. When it’s time to sleep, and you get in bed, stop looking at your phone, and set it to silent so that your sleep is not disrupted. One excellent peace of health advice I was given was to not even look at your phone an hour before you sleep and an hour after you wake up. Wow, that is not easy to do, but I have personally started to adopt a policy of not looking at my phone 20 minutes before and after I sleep, and I will never look at my phone while in bed, unless it’s an important message or to check the time.

Always negotiate a minimum amount of sleep before accepting an overnight booking

Talking about sleep: if you receive a request for an overnight booking, it’s important to discuss and negotiate a time/amount to sleep in advance. Even if you feel you can take the booking without needing sleep, it’s important to figure out whether this is a booking where the client has activity planned for the entire night, or whether you will enjoy an evening and then sleep together – these are two very different bookings and it’s important to know what you are accepting.
Personally, when receiving a booking for all-night, I always request that we get to sleep at least 4 hours during the booking time, and I very rarely consider an all-night booking unless we agree on a fair period of sleep to be included.
I hope these tips are helpful and I would like to bring you more in the coming months. Last but not least, I just want to share a good escort platform, Geylang666.net which really provides a safe and good amount of payment for all of you. Stay safe!
Russian Doll

What really happened to backpage.com?

Rewind to 2017 and backpage.com was the ‘go to’ escort advertising site for sex workers around the world. From Boston to Bangkok, Manchester to Manila, Backpage’s escort listings were the dominant domain for clients and companions looking to connect. But by the spring of 2018 Backpage’s adult listings had disappeared, and shortly after, the site (and its sister sites, such as Cracker) was closed down altogether, with stark FBI notifications in their place, detailing the seizure of all sites affiliated with the once central sex classifieds.

As popular and widespread as Backpage was, its fame wasn’t gained through innovation or style. The site was a simple and old-fashioned classifieds listings board, hugely similar to its longstanding rival, Craigslist. Like Craigslist, Backpage was a throwback to print classifieds that often existed on the back pages of weekly newspapers and monthly magazines, which themselves had been the go-to advertising space for adult services in much of the 80s and 90’s, pre-internet era.

Backpage’s clashes with various US senators and law enforcement groups had been common knowledge, seen publicly through a number of high-profile lawsuits, national and international media stories, and even in the Netflix screened documentary, ‘I am Jane Doe’ (1). But it still came as a big surprise to see this hugely popular escort site close its doors in an instance, and even more shocking, were the set of highly controversial law changes which followed; having an immense impact on sex workers around the world.

New Times (and new enemies) in Arizona

The early beginnings of Backpage can be traced back to 1977, when students Michael Lacey and James Larkin began writing for New Times, an alt weekly in Arizona, USA. Their passion for journalism grew, as did their ambitions for the paper itself, and before long they had managed to seize control and ownership of the publication, and set about creating their alternative news media empire.

Although their initial focus was to develop their brand of investigative journalism, they soon developed a strong understanding of revenue growth, with a strategy built around the paper’s classifieds section. Lacey and Larkin realized that switching the publication’s policy of selling single page ads, to growing the classifieds section, and being able to sell multiple lower fee ads per page, could quickly increase the income and profitability of the business. This strategy proved ingenious, and the pair not only grew the income of New Times, but also went on to buy out several other struggling weekly papers around the country, growing their influence from Arizona to Colorado, Texas, and Florida. Each new publication copied this new, classifieds focussed revenue model and each one swiftly became a profitable venture.

While a page of big retail ads might net $1,000, a page of classifieds, 100 ads at $25 a pop, could bring in $2,500. (2)

Despite creating a strong, scalable, financial model, Lacey and Larkin began to re-invest their new found advertising wealth back into their content, pushing for to find high profile exposés and stories that uncovered dark secrets and collusions between politicians, political parties, and big corporations. They began hiring seasoned and well-respected reporters, afford them healthy budgets for investigative journalism, and quickly grew a reputation for challenging the government and ruffling the feathers of some of American’s most powerful politicians and influential tycoons.

The month after 9/11, for instance, The New Times Broward-Palm Beach published an exposé on how lapses in federal immigration policy had allowed the hijackers to enter the country. In 2003, Westword got the scoop on a sexual assault scandal at the US Air Force Academy. In 2013, The Miami New Times ran a story on the steroid scandal in Major League Baseball, which resulted in the suspension of 14 players. (2)

The New Times Media Group, and Lacey and Larkin in particular, were swiftly on the radar of a number of senators and those high up in government. Perhaps their most notable adversaries at this point were the Arizona based McCaine family, with John (the US senator for Arizona) and Cindy (the daughter of wealthy Beer Tycoon), victims of a number of stories and exposés led by New Times. The gung-ho approach of the New Times Group’s reporting led to a bombardment of lawsuits and legal challenges, but such was the success of their classifieds based revenue model, and fast cross-country expansion, they saw off every legal challenge without breaking stride. They continued to grow their dominant grip on the alt weekly scene, as well as their reputation for stories which dug up dirt on some of the country’s most aspirational leaders and prominent politicians.

 

Ashe C, Kuala Lumpur

“I wasn’t affected that much [by the closure of Backpage] because I was new at the time. But I know from some friends who use the site for a long time, they relied heavily on Backpage, and because of it they didn’t need to work on the streets.”

A walk on the Wildside

By the end of the 80’s, it was clear that the stability and growth of the New Times Group depended massively on their dominance in local classifieds advertising (which by now made up the vast majority of their income), and moreover, it was adult ads which made up the lion’s share of that revenue, dominating back page ads in almost every one of their regional papers. So, in 1989, they launched an adult specific section for each publication, branded ‘Wildside’. This new, spicy, adults only section was moderated in order to block obvious ads offering sex for money, but clear codewords fell into place and it quickly grew in popularity with sex workers across a number of cities in the US.

By 2001, the New Times Group owned 11 regional papers which generated over $100 Million in revenue, however, by now a popular online classifieds site in San Francisco, called Craigslist, had begun expanding to cover other regions and was also gaining a reputation for its own racy adult ads. By 2003 the growth and popularity of Craigslist was coinciding with a decline in revenue for Lacey and Larkin’s news group, and they decided to create an online classifieds site of their own. Using the help of Carl Ferrer, an ad salesman with a wealth of experience in classified advertising, they launched backpage.com in 2004.

Backpage.com wasn’t an instant hit, but it did show some promise, and its growth was notably aided by the group’s acquisition of The Village Voice, the largest alt weekly in the USA, and a paper which rivalled New Times for its reputation of exposing government wrong-doing and corruption. The Village Voice became the jewel in the crown of the New Times Group, and it helped to propel their online classifieds to reach new areas, including New York City and its infamous sex work scene.

The beginning of the end

Backpage.com managed to stem the fall in New Times Group’s revenue, and was being noticed as a serious competitor to Craigslist, within the sex work community at least. By midway through the 2010’s both Backpage and Craigslist were fast expanding overseas, with Craigslist quickly becoming the largest online classifieds site in the world. However, back home in the USA, several legal investigations were beginning to seriously explore what roles such online classifieds were playing in sex trafficking. At this point, it was Craigslist at the centre of many such reports and accusations.

Revenue at Backpage increased to $135 million in 2014 from $5.3 million in 2008, according to a Senate report last year. More than 90 percent of the earnings came from adult ads. (6)

By 2008, Craigslist was getting so much unwanted media attention for their adult ads, they began hiring legal experts to work as ad moderators, and introduced a system where anyone placing adult ads needed to verify their phone number and pay a fee by credit card. This didn’t ease up the pressure of looming legal challenges and in 2010 Craigslist abruptly closed its Erotic Services section. The removal of its adult section didn’t completely stop adult service providers from advertising on craigslist, as many creatively turned to other sections of the site to offer up their services (the ’casual encounters’ dating section became a hotbed for escort ads on Craigslist). But as Craigslist did their best to discourage adult advertisers, new sites began to take the limelight, including specialist escort sites, such as MyRedBook and RentBoy, however, it was Backpage.com which took over as the market leader.

When Craigslist cracked down on its “erotic services” category in 2010, Backpage picked up the slack. Posting in most sections of Backpage was free, but the site charged for adult ads. (8)

As the scene switched its main focus to Backpage, so did the FBI. Yet, unlike the CEOs of Craigslist, Lacey and Larkin had no intentions of caving to legal pressures and closed their adult sections. Not only did they have the funds to take on any legal challenges, they also knew they had the law on their side, and in particular, section 230 of the communications decency act. Backpage stood their ground, but lines of communication were opened between the site and US law enforcement. Eventually compromises were made, as Backpage introduced a number of rules and measures to tackle issues of trafficking, underage use, and other illegal activity.

By late January 2011, Backpage had implemented many of the [FBI’s] recommendations: It had banned photographs with nudity, drawn up a list of “inappropriate terms,” beefed up its vetting process, and begun referring “ads containing possible minors” directly to [FBI] staff. (2)

New Times won several high-profile media battles, and almost each time it was article 230 which ultimately came to their rescue. Then in July 2013 a group of congress members got together and signed a letter, demanding article 230 be overhauled. A year later, Rentboy and MyRedBook, Backpages two biggest US rivals, both succumbed to the pressures of the Justice Department and Homeland Security, with the site owners pleading guilty to violations of the Travel Act, and in both cases, the sites were permanently shut down.

Section 230 says that “No provider or user of an interactive computer service shall be treated as the publisher or speaker of any information provided by another information content provider”. In other words, online intermediaries that host or republish speech are protected against a range of laws that might otherwise be used to hold them legally responsible for what others say and do. (3)

A new line of attack was taken as a group of senators put pressure on Visa and Mastercard to stop supporting payments on Backpage, which temporarily lost New Times Group their main stream of revenue. But Backpage fought back and won the right to use the credit card services via a judgement in federal court. The legal challenges were becoming relentless, and at times very personal; in 2015, Larkin, Lacey, and Carl Ferrer were arrested under pimping and conspiracy to pimp charges, and paraded in front of the national media. They were shown in a staged court appearance, sat behind bars, dressed in correctional facility orange jumpsuits. And within 4 days all charges were thrown out, due to section 230.

Mistress Dyana, Kuala Lumpur

“Backpage was a very good website, there were always a lot of clients. When Backpage was closed it affected me greatly. I suddenly got less bookings, and less income, and now I have to spend up to $200 a week to advertise on sites where I get less clients.”

The return of the McCaines

Unbeknownst to Larkin and Lacey, a Senate subcommittee had been created to investigate Backpage’s use of article 230, and review the law itself. During their final report, released on January 8th, 2017, a conclusion was made that Backpage and its staff had invalidated their protection under article 230, by developing a moderation system which helped pimps and illegal posters to conceal their activities. This therefore meant Backpage was part of the content creation rather than simply being host of such content. Ultimately, rather than reporting, or even removing ads which showed suspicion of pimping, trafficking, or underage activity, they were being accused of helping posters avoid such words, and in some cases, automatic filters were removing such terms, before allowing the user to post.

The report outlined three major steps in Backpage’s road to perdition. In the early days of the site, most ads for commercial sex were deleted outright. By early 2009, however, Ferrer had begun to instruct his employees to manually remove any obscene photos and “forbidden words,” then post the ad anyway. (2)

On release of the report, Backpage.com immediately closed its adult section, however, it was much too late. A few familiar faces had shown great keenness to be involved in the new legal challenges, two of those being John and Cindy McCaine. Several civil lawsuits were filed within the following 6 months, and with the use of section 230 starting to look less of a sure thing, Lacey, Larkin, and Ferrer began lawyering up and attempting to move around funds for safekeeping.

In August of 2017, a group of 20 senators launched the Stop Enabling Sex Traffickers Act (SESTA), which would remove the protections of article 230, making websites more responsible for the content they host. This bill certainly didn’t go unnoticed, and it received a quick backlash from several internet giants, such as Facebook, Google, and Twitter, who all pointed out the devastating effect it would have to free speech. However, the timing could not have been worse, as these same internet organizations were also becoming under investigation, in light of the Cambridge Analytica scandal, and were soon pulled in front of congress and grilled over their conduct regarding data and privacy.

It seems a compromise was found (most likely agreed during a series of secret meetings between the internet leaders and US bill makers), as protests from the internet giants subsided, and SESTA was combined with another rashly organized bill called FOSTA (Fight Online Sex Trafficking Act). Many smaller organisations continued to be extremely vocal over the harm the SESTA/FOSTA bill would have over websites and internet users, but the bill passed, almost unanimously.

Though FOSTA-SESTA passed through Congress nearly unanimously, it has received widespread criticism. Several major organizations have expressed concern about the bill, including the ACLU, the Center for Democracy and Technology, the Electronic Frontier Foundation, the Sex Workers Outreach Project, and the Wikimedia Foundation. (4)

The end of Backpage and the start of SESTA/FOSTA

Within 15 days of SESTA/FOSTA passing, Carl Ferrer caved, pleading guilty to conspiracy to facilitate prostitution. This seemingly gave the Feds the final ammunition they needed, and a day later the homes of Lacey and Larkin were raided, and they were placed under arrest, charged with 93-count indictment with crimes related to trafficking, pimping, and money laundering. Backpage and all its affiliated sites were immediately seized by the FBI, and closed. 2 years on, not helped by a global pandemic, and the cases are yet to go to court, with both Lacey and Larkin on Million Dollar bail bonds, house arrest, and with the majority of their funds and assets already seized.

While that saw the end to Backpage, it wasn’t the end of SESTA/FOSTA, which caused shockwaves through the sex work industry. A number of adult sites immediately closed, and Craigslist quickly removed their dating pages. Reddit closed a number of sex work related threads such as r/escorts and r/sugardaddy, and sex worker social media platform Switter, was kicked by Cloudflare. Even as recently as June of 2020, the SESTA/FOSTA act was used to help close CityXGuide, the site quickly becoming ‘the new Backpage’, in the US.

CityXGuide was one of the sites that became popular in Backpage’s absence, even though CityXGuide’s owner Wilhan Martano bought the domain in 2004. Martano will be the first person tried under FOSTA, for one count of Promotion and Facilitation of Prostitution and Reckless Disregard of Sex Trafficking. (7)

Many genuine sex workers around the world have been devastated by these law changes. Not only did they lose their most reliable platform for meeting clients online, but these new laws are making it very hard to find advertising sites willing to openly support them. Since Backpage’s closure there has been no clear evidence proving a decrease in sex trafficking, in fact, quite the opposite has been seen, with stories coming out that a number of police forces were working with the help of Backpage, and since its closure have seen the number of arrests and successful cases, decrease.

“With Backpage, we would subpoena the ads and it would tell a lot of the story,” Daggy said. “Also, with the ads we would catch our victim at a hotel room, which would give us a crime scene. There’s a ton of evidence at a crime scene. Now, since [Backpage] has gone down, we’re getting late reports of them and we don’t have much to go by.” (5)

Online classifieds not only allow genuine escorts to work from the safety and comfort of their own homes, but a great number of sex workers used Backpage and similar services to trade information and vet client, limiting their exposure to violence, abuse and other dangers. With these site closures, many escorts were pushed to find clients on the streets and take much greater risks in who and where they met. Since the closure of Backpage and the introduction of SESTA/FOSTA, a number of reports and statements by sex worker organizations, have noted an increase in street workers, violence, and even suicide.

According to a Hacking/Hustling community report, after April 2018, 33.8% of sex workers surveyed reported an increase in violence from clients and 72.45% of online participants reported an increase in economic instability after the seizure of Backpage. And within one month of FOSTA’s enactment, thirteen sex workers were reported missing and two were dead by suicide. (10)

Farrah Mills, London

“I think it’s always going to be really difficult for escorts to have this constant intrusion and shut down of sites that we all rely on to earn money, instead of punishing us they need to find a way to remove the suspect profiles but leave the site up for those that depend on it”

Intentionally or not, the bill makes no distinction between human trafficking and legitimate, consensual sex work. As such, FOSTA-SESTA essentially makes platform holders liable for talk about sex on their platforms. As my colleague Violet Blue wrote, “Lawmakers did not fact-check the bill’s claims, research the religious neocons behind it, nor did they listen to constituents.” That’s not to mention that FOSTA-SESTA contravenes the First Amendment’s protection of free speech.11)

The progression and popularity of classifieds sites and their adult listings didn’t create the sex work industry, they only brought it into the modern world. Arguments continue as to whether Lacey, Larkin, Ferrer, and their classifieds network, were doing enough to tackle issues of trafficking and underage sex workers, or whether they were supporting pimps and other lawbreakers. But there seems very little doubt as to how SESTA/FOSTA has created a more dangerous industry for genuine sex workers, and failed to make any progress on the real issues of the exploitation and abuse of those most vulnerable.

Consensual adult sex work and sex trafficking will likely always operate in overlapping spaces—whether online or offline. And just as the crackdown on Backpage has changed the landscape for sex workers, it’s also pushed more sex trafficking onto the streets, where there’s no telling who a client is before getting into a car. The internet certainly made it easier for everyone to sell sex, but it made it safer for a lot of people, too. (9)

Sources and further reading:

I am Jane Doe : https://www.iamjanedoefilm.com/ Netflix https://www.netflix.com/title/80167459Inside Backpage’s vicious battle with the feds – https://www.wired.com/story/feds-seize-backpagecom-site-linked-to-sex-trafficking/Section 230 of the Communications Decency Act – https://www.eff.org/issues/cda230FOSTA-SETSA is now law – where does that leave the internet? – https://www.privateinternetaccess.com/blog/fosta-sesta-is-now-law-where-does-that-leave-the-internet/ More Police Admitting That FOSTA/SESTA Has Made It Much More Difficult To Catch Pimps And Traffickers – https://www.techdirt.com/articles/20180705/01033440176/more-police-admitting-that-fosta-sesta-has-made-it-much-more-difficult-to-catch-pimps-traffickers.shtml U.S. Seizes Backpage.com, a Site Accused of Enabling Prostitution – https://www.nytimes.com/2018/04/07/us/politics/backpage-prostitution-classified.htmlSex worker site, CityXGuide, taken down – https://observer.com/2020/07/sex-worker-site-cityxguide-take-down-protests/The rise and fall of Backpage – https://aimgroup.com/2018/08/26/the-rise-and-fall-of-backpage-2/There is no new Backpage – https://slate.com/technology/2019/02/backpage-sex-workers-fosta-sesta-switter-tryst-trafficking.htmlErased: The impact of FOSTA-SESTA- https://hackinghustling.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/Erased_Updated.pdfFOSTA-SESTA silencing sex workers – https://www.engadget.com/2018-04-11-fosta-sesta-silencing-sex-workers.html

Is Sex Work, Work?

 

The Cambridge Dictionary defines work as.. ‘an activity, such as a job, where a person uses physical or mental effort to perform a task or service, usually for money.’

There is no real argument as to whether sex work is work, the word ‘work’ is in the name and the dictionary definition couldn’t be any clearer. What people really mean in the many debates over whether sex work is ‘work’, is whether sex work should be acknowledged as an ‘acceptable’ means of earning money, and moreover, whether sex work should be decriminalised and afforded the same rights and support as other industries and workforces.

The term ‘sex work’ was first used by activist Carol Leigh, in 1978(1), it was adopted by several pro sex worker movements in the 80s, and is now commonly used by organisations, sexual health agencies, and in the media, along with the similar term ‘adult work’. Previous to this, other commonly used terms such as prostitute, hooker, and call girl, carried insinuations of illegality, immorality, and were generally used as an insult or slur. Whereas these terms undermined pro sex work arguments, ‘sex work’ became a simple, yet powerful term, which didn’t add further to the stigma of being a sex worker. Since its adoption, there have been those who take objection to the very fact it calls sex work ‘work’, and many are vocal as to why this shouldn’t be so.

For the sake of this article, by the term ‘sex work/worker’ we will be referring to escorts and the escort industry, but it’s important to note that ‘sex work’ and ‘adult work’ have grown as umbrella terms, now representing all those working in sex industries; from escorts and cam performers, to strippers and porn actors/actresses. Some may argue against certain sex work roles stronger than others, but sex workers of every different kind share one very common goal, to be recognised as a workforce, and afford rights and support… “those who do sex work, in all of their workplaces and in varied conditions, deserve the rights and respect accorded to workers in any other industry.” (2)

The sex worker next door

Sex work isn’t like any other work, and that in itself is a cause of offence. Sex work doesn’t slot neatly into how people see employment. Sex workers don’t work traditional hours, in a familiar workspace, they don’t have health and safety inspections, they rarely pay taxes, and can’t claim for work related benefits when things aren’t going well. Sex workers are alien to most people, who simply don’t have sex worker relatives, friends, or neighbours. Or so they may think.

Like most people, sex workers use their work as a means to earn a living and support their family. Most sex workers are carers and parents; it’s estimated that 1 in 3 UK female sex workers are single parents (3), and in Thailand and Philippines a single sex worker typically supports 2-3 generations of their family. While sex workers may seem alien to most, they share the same values and are living next door. They are loved daughters and sons, supportive parents, friendly neighbours, close friends, and extremely dedicated carers. They typically choose sex work as their means of supporting themselves and their loved ones.

What sex work opponents actually have in mind when they cringe … is that sex work does not—and cannot—resemble their … more respected labour administering social projects, conducting research and lobbying. To consider sex work to be on the same level as that work breaks down the divisions that elevate some forms of labor while denigrating others. (4)

It’s fair to assume that the vast majority of those who campaign against sex work, are not campaigning against sex (or work), and many of them have active sex lives of their own. Sex work doesn’t comply with how they value sex. They typically see sex as something which should strictly be used as a way of expressing love, to consume a marriage, or at a stretch, sharing a moment of passion with someone outside of a long-term relationship. For one stranger to have sex with another, it is rarely an issue, but when two consenting strangers have sex in exchange for money (or something other than love or intimacy), this is where the offense is taken. Even when sex work is done so in absolute privacy, and between two happily consenting adults, the fact it is happening at all still seems to cross a moral boundary that for some, must never be crossed, and there must then always be a villain and a victim.

 

Naomi, Kuala Lumpur

“Sex work is not always about sex. Sometimes it is about intimacy or just company, and sometimes it is almost like therapy. But even when it is just about sex, I am still proud of the work I do, and I will not be ashamed. I am a good person … Some people look at sex workers as bad people without knowing them … In my culture many people think that even just to have sex with someone you are not married to is immoral. To me this feels so very ignorant, and lacks understanding, compassion, and empathy.”

Are all sex workers victims?

Many sex workers are victims, although how, where, and why sex workers are victims is not always so black and white. There are serious issues and concerns with the way many people are introduced to sex work, as well as their treatment, conditions, and support within it. There is an immense lack of support and assistance for those with addictions and other health and social issues, and there are few clear routes or guidance for those desperately looking for a way out. But the leading anti-sex work argument often concludes that sex work must be criminalised in order to protect these vulnerable sex workers. Yet, in so many ways it is the criminalisation of sex work which pushes sex workers further towards the margins, and darker corners of society, feeding those very issues of addiction, abuse, isolation, and exploitation.

Recognising sex work as work, and affording sex workers the ability to operate safely within the eyes of the law, isn’t about supporting the evil predators, controlling pimps or abusive clients, quite the opposite. It’s about introducing reasonable laws which afford sex workers basic human rights. Essentially, it should allow for sex workers and their supporters to create unions and support networks, and be able to approach the wider community and authorities in times of need. While those who campaign against the recognition of sex work may proclaim to do so in order to save sex workers, the truth is, many sex workers do not wish to be saved in this way.

“A few months ago, I met a feminist activist in Thailand who now works in the field of sexual and reproductive health and rights. … Back in the 1980s she had wanted to rescue Thai sex workers in the Netherlands. To her surprise, they had told her they didn’t want to be rescued. They did not mind trading sex for money but wanted to earn more and work in better conditions. If she could help them with that, she was welcome. This and other similar interactions changed her views of sex work and sex workers.” (5)

Most sex workers are not against being helped and supported, but for the many who work of their own free will, they are not looking to be rescued or removed from the industry, they are looking for rights and support, within it. The criminalisation of sex work does not simply save victims, it often isolates them. Even when that criminalisation is focussed on the paying clients, it pushes sex workers towards more risk and danger.

“Where some or all aspects of sex work were criminalised, concerns about their own or their clients’ arrest meant that sex workers often had to rush screening clients, negotiating services, or work in isolated places, to avoid the police. This increased sex workers’ vulnerability to theft and violence.” (6)

The criminalisation which forces the sex work industry into the darker spaces, not only raises the dangers and lessens the outreach for help and support, but it also disconnects sex workers from those entrusted to police and protect their communities. This in turn can build great alienation and even resentment towards sex workers. It further encourages repressive policing and allows for corrupt and exploitive police officers, who only add to the fear, abuse, and helplessness which already exists, and strengthens the ability for abusive clients and exploitative third parties to operate.

“Sex workers who had been exposed to repressive policing … had a three times higher chance of experiencing sexual or physical violence by anyone. They were also twice as likely to have HIV and/or other sexually transmitted infections (STIs), compared with sex workers who had avoided repressive policing practices.” (6)

Becka, Manila

“I do this work by my own choice. I don’t have strong career prospects or good job choices, because of the life I was born into. If I am able to use my body and my ability to make someone else happy as a means of making money, why should I have that taken away? In my country, religious morals are so deeply woven into legislation. They don’t care about people’s freedom or choices, they are afraid of people undermining marriage and the family values, and afraid of the churches losing their control and influence.”

Is this a fight against trafficking?

Arguments against sex work, and its decriminalisation, often claim that the criminalisation of sex work is needed in order to stop sex trafficking. The phrase ‘sex trafficking’ has become an incredibly powerful anti-sex work term; it instantly paints an image that the industry is made up of victims and traffickers, with little space in-between. Not only is this incredibly misleading, but while trafficking and exploitation is a major issue of the industry, it is not unique to sex work. Labour trafficking and exploitation is a critical issue, rife in almost all industries which attract lower income, migrant workers. From nannies and domestic workers, to the construction, labouring, and farming industries, labour exploitation and people trafficking issues are of similar nature and proportion.

“Of the 24.9 million victims of forced labour, 16 million people are exploited in the private sector including domestic work, construction or agriculture. 4.8 million people are victims of forced sexual exploitation, and 4 million people were in forced labour imposed by state authorities.” (7)

Anti-sex work campaigners separate issues of sex worker exploitation from the trafficking and exploitation in other industries, and would not wish to see their arguments and proposals be regarded on the same terms or context. In these other industries, the idea of such wide spread criminalisation would make no logical sense and would not be entertained as a means of tackling the real issues. Keeping ‘sex trafficking’ as a completely separate and unique issue is needed in order to keep pushing the agenda that sex work is not work, and the industry and its workforce must not be treated as equal to other industries and workers.

There is no illusion that acknowledging sex work as being an industry, and affording legal support and rights to its workforce, would quickly solve issues of trafficking and exploitation. But, affording sex workers basic labour rights, recognition, and greater support, would at least bring it into the conversation when talking about wider issues of labour exploitation. More importantly, this would help bring more sex worker voices into such debates, and push toward more effective solutions.

“Migrant and trafficked women’s stories are strikingly similar regardless of the sector in which they are exploited. They all speak of deceptive agents and brokers, limited freedom of movement, physical, psychological, and sexual violence at the workplace, as well as stigma upon return … exploitation in the sex industry isn’t unique at all.” (5)

 

Celina, London

“my sex work is a consensual transaction between adults, and it does not violate anyone’s human rights … Sex work IS work and must be governed by law and [have] protections similar to other jobs. It is a necessary condition to realize that sex workers’ rights are human rights.”

Does it really matter whether we call it work?

Campaigns, debates, and discussions over how sex work should be governed and how the issues surrounding it are best tackled, are very rarely instigated, or lead, by sex workers. Many of the conversations which lead to political campaigning and legislation, fail to take into account any sex worker voices, and are seldom based on in-depth academic research or direct outreach to the sex worker community (for more exposure on this look no further than ‘Sex, Lies, & Statistics’ by Dr Brooke Magnanti(8)).

“Unlike in other conversations on labor exploitation, workers in the sex industry are neither seen as experts on the nuances of their work nor as the people best positioned to identify solutions. They are treated as ignorant of the conversation, at best, and as a driver of trafficking at worst.” (9)

Sex work conversations which are not inclusive of the wider community, not only add to the stigma and issues of actual sex workers, but miss out on value insight and guidance. There were clear examples of this during the introduction of the SESTA/FOSTA act in the US. This legislation was pushed through despite great vocal concern from sex workers and their supports. It has gone on to cause further vulnerability and create many more victims.

“While anti-trafficking organizations were pushing the dire need for this legislation and arguing that it would do no outright damage, sex workers were explaining that this would cause websites to close, displacing people into precarity and vulnerability. In the year and a half since its passage, the law has not been used for any new civil litigation, yet websites have indeed closed and sex workers have indeed been displaced and faced precarity and vulnerability. Sex workers were clearly the experts who should have been heard before its passage.” (9)

Acknowledging that sex work is work, is often seen as being naïve of (or even in support of) exploitation and trafficking. But sex work between consenting adults of legal age, and the exploitation of vulnerable people, are two very different things. The blurring of these lines seems to only work as a tool for avoiding real conversations on how sex workers can be supported, how genuine victims can be saved, and how further victimization can be avoided.

“Criminalizing adult, voluntary, and consensual sex – including the commercial exchange of sexual services – is incompatible with the human right to personal autonomy and privacy. In short – a government should not be telling consenting adults who they can have sexual relations with and on what terms.” Statement by Human Rights Watch, August 2019(10)

Sex work isn’t always empowering to the sex worker. Sex work is rarely a dream job, and many sex workers won’t find their work satisfying or fulfilling. Many sex workers will question their choice of career, many more will have ambitions beyond sex work, and many are looking for a way out. But that doesn’t mean sex work is not work. The majority of sex workers simply see it as a their choice of work (whether it be a temporary or a longer-term option), and in many of these cases it is simply their preferred means of earning a living based on the options they have. When sex work is between consenting adults it should not only be recognised as work, but it should be given the same protection and rights as any form of work. “Sex workers aren’t asking for you to approve of sex work, they’re asking for equal protection under the law.” (11)

Sources and further reading:

Carol Leigh coins the term ‘sex work’ : https://www.nswp.org/timeline/event/carol-leigh-coins-the-term-sex-workLets’ call sex work what it is: work : https://www.thenation.com/article/archive/lets-call-sex-work-what-it-work/ – This article is adapted from Playing the Whore: The Work of Sex Work, (https://www.versobooks.com/books/1568-playing-the-whore)A review of the literature on sex workers and social exclusion – https://assets.publishing.service.gov.uk/government/uploads/system/uploads/attachment_data/file/303927/A_Review_of_the_Literature_on_sex_workers_and_social_exclusion.pdfLet’s call sex work what it is, work – https://www.thenation.com/article/archive/lets-call-sex-work-what-it-work/Sex workers can tell you why sex work is work – speak to them – https://www.opendemocracy.net/en/beyond-trafficking-and-slavery/sex-workers-can-tell-you-why-sex-work-is-work-speak-to-them/Criminalisation and repressive policing of sex work – https://www.lshtm.ac.uk/newsevents/news/2018/criminalisation-and-repressive-policing-sex-work-linked-increased-risk?utm_source=facebook-press&utm_medium=social&utm_campaign=sexworkerpolicyModern slavery: facts & figures – https://www.unseenuk.org/modern-slavery/facts-and-figures#:~:text=Of%20the%2024.9%20million%20victims,labour%20imposed%20by%20state%20authorities.Sex, lies, & statistics – https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/36224357-sex-lies-statisticsDecriminalization by any other name: sex worker right in federal advocacy – https://www.opendemocracy.net/en/beyond-trafficking-and-slavery/decriminalization-any-other-name-sex-worker-rights-federal-advocacy/Why sex work should be decriminalised – https://www.hrw.org/news/2019/08/07/why-sex-work-should-be-decriminalizedSweet, smart, strong, and sexy: the sex workers taking a stand in Thailand – https://www.opendemocracy.net/en/beyond-trafficking-and-slavery/sweet-smart-strong-and-sexy-the-sex-workers-taking-a-stand-in-thailand/

How will Covid-19 change the sex work industry?

 

In mid-February, when reports of Corona virus cases were starting to dominate international headlines, the initial impact on the sex work industry seemed minimal. In Macau and Hong Kong, we had seen Smooci activity drop, as locals adhered to a precautionary 15-day shutdown, closing casinos, bars, and karaoke lounges, but that inconvenience was a few days from being lifted, and life in Asia’s World City about to return to its normal, chaotic self. At this stage few were predicting a global epidemic, which would turn the lives of many upside down, and with sex workers among those to face the harshest of new realities.

Holiday and business trips were suddenly being cancelled at an alarming rate, and within days, flights and non-essential travel were being restricted, and then forbidden altogether. Repatriation programs were quickly put in place to bring expats and long stayers back to their homelands. The Hong Kong and Macau shutdowns were not only kept in place, but hardened, with everyone ordered to strictly stay at home. The shutdowns spread through Asia, and then Europe and the rest of the world, as we all struggled to let the reality of a global pandemic sink in. What would normally be known as the quietest months of the sex work calendar, and a notably uneasy time for sex workers living close to the poverty line, was now an unthinkable crisis.

Tepidly, countries and communities have started easing social distancing rules in a bid to bring back some form of ‘normality’ and kick start economies, but uncertainty and worry still grips the many. The way we work and interact with others is going to be very different for some time to come, and those in the sex work industry are anxiously trying to figure out, how will sex work be in the coming weeks, months, and years.

Russian Doll, Hong Kong Escort

“During the lockdowns work has been very very quiet. It’s important to stay positive and healthy and so I’ve been using this time to focus on essential tasks concerning my spirituality, education, and physical fitness … I’ve been lucky and haven’t suffered any great losses, yet. But we all really hope that things will be busy again this summer, or many of us will face serious problems.”

What can be hoped for this Summer?

While many government and community schemes have been set up to support the non-essential workforce, with varying degrees of success, many sex workers have struggled to be included in such relief packages. Sex work is rarely recognised as work at all, and austerity measures, inefficient social programmes and benefit systems, are the reason so many turn to sex work in the first place.

This summer will see people allowed to re-enter the work place, but to do so following strict distancing rules. Sex work is not just a contact occupation but one which requires the most intimate of contact between strangers; very few sex acts can be satisfyingly undertaken at 2 metres apart. So where does that leave a sex worker, short of adequate support and charitable relief, knowing that an already unnecessarily dangerous occupation, has the added challenge of avoiding a widespread illness which can be highly contagious and undetectable at the same time.

One sex worker unable to work can mean an entire family in danger. The vast majority of sex workers are also carers, financially responsible for immediate family. In places such as Thailand and Philippines, it’s very common for a single sex worker to be responsible for the financial care of not just their children and parents, but have an economic responsibility which extends to grandparents, brothers and sister, the children of their siblings, and even uncles, aunts, and cousins.

Some sex workers have been able turn to camming and sex content creation, and perhaps this summer will see more explore this as an option. However, camming and content sales are not a booming industry. Camming is already a highly competitive and over saturated market, with very long hours and limited earnings. The necessary demands and skills are also very different, and there’s far less opportunity to be discreet, with few having adequate private space to do such work when living with family. For the vast majority, it isn’t a viable alternative.

“In Hubei, China, one of the first countries to face a lockdown, domestic violence reports to the police increased by 300% in the first month.” (15)

Rises in domestic abuse have been noted around the world, since the pandemic began. A combination of anxiety, confusion, helplessness, and economic constraints, have contributed to a concerning rise in tension and violence, in many homes. Sex workers are a group who constantly face regular fear of abuse, both physical and mental. In the US, there was already a lot of concern about a sharp increase in abuse towards sex workers, forced to take more risks after the recent introduction of the SESTA/FOSTA act, which closed a number of high-profile adult platforms. (1) Things are only likely to get more concerning as sex workers try to adjust to these difficult new challenges.

Through history, sex workers have often been an easy target for blame and ridicule during times of panic and uncertainty, labelled as disease spreaders and conscienceless predators. “Sex work is the vault in which society stores some of its keenest fears and anxieties,” aptly stated in ‘Revolting prostitutes: The fight for sex workers’ rights.’ While the majority of level headed people would have no instinct to project their fears and anxieties on to sex workers at this time, there are those who are already exercising hatred towards health care workers in senseless responses to the epidemic. Sadly, we have to factor in the possibility of such twisted and mindless actions, and it’s genuinely worrying that we may see an increase in violence and negative attitudes toward those returning to sex work at this time.

Though restrictions will continue to ease and greater freedom will emerge, sex workers will likely face a very difficult and frustrating Summer. Yes, some regular clients will return, but there will be notable financial restraints. Business and leisure travel will still be limited, recommended as essential only, and escort services will be the first expenditure crossed out on many client’s reduced monthly budget. There is reason to be optimistic as this is a pandemic likely to be under control in 1–2 years, rather than 1–2 decades, but the coming months will be challenging, and many sex workers will face very difficult decisions regarding their personal health and safety.

Danna, Manila, TS Escort

” Since the pandemic started, I’ve been afraid to meet with strangers. With total lockdowns here in Manila I haven’t had the opportunity to work so I haven’t had to face that fear, but I’m having very mixed feelings when I think about it. Part of me is desperate to get back to work so I can earn money and help my family during this time, while another part of me is nervous to meet people while there’s still a danger I can get sick, and then make my family sick . “

Will there be a ‘high season’ this year?

In most parts of Asia, November through to February is known as the high season for sex workers. No matter how tough the Spring and Summer months have been, there’s a sense that during the high season, when numbers of single tourists and business travellers vastly increase, work and rewards also increase, substantially, and a bad year can yet become a prosperous one.

“Tourism won’t be one of the industries hardest hit by the virus, it will be the industry hardest hit.” (4)

That high season is inextricably linked to the travel and tourism industry, which itself is perhaps the industry hardest hit during the pandemic. Major airlines are already in panic, closing down hubs, laying off 10,000s of staff, and few governments are well positioned to hand over adequate bailout packages. There have been very mixed opinions on whether this will result in a steep rise or fall in the cost of flights, but all are in agreement that the number of flights and travellers will significantly drop.

Not only will budgets be low, but confidence will be too. When airports and major flight routes reopen, will the average person still be willing to jump on an internationals flight? Knowing that it would not only bring a higher chance of catching Covid-19, but it could then leave you in a foreign country with few health insurers willing to cover any medical treatment needed.

The global shutdowns mean many businesses have been forced to switch to remote work and online meetings. The popularity of software such as Zoom and Microsoft Teams have highlighted the ease, speed, and effectiveness of a good internet connection and reliable cloud meeting app. Many companies will now think twice before planning future business trips, especially when the purse strings need to be pulled tight.

There are glimmers of hope. China has one of the world’s largest domestic travel markets, and within a week of easing restrictions and allowing free travel, it immediately a 40% increase in movement, as national travel was quickly picking up. According to Dr. Wolfgang George Arlt, director of the China Outbound Tourism Research Institute, travel and tourism within China could be back to 70% within the next 6 month. (4) While some have called this extremely optimistic, it’s important to highlight how significant a busy travel and tourism market is, not just to China but to any healthy economy.

In the UK and Germany, the travel and tourism sectors make up 6% of the national workforce, in the Philippines that’s 10%, in Spain and Italy it’s as much as 13%, and in Thailand it’s estimated that travel and tourism make up close to 15% of national employment. All of these countries will be massively focussed on bringing the travel and tourism sectors back to life, to save economies and limit unemployment.

” Sex workers .. are taking care of each other and our communities with initiatives, like hardship funds, to raise money for people in need. This is an extension of the caring work that sex workers, mostly women, do for each other every day. Which is largely invisible as a result of the prostitution laws that prevent us from working together for safety.” (5)

During these tough times, sex workers are pulling together. There are examples of charities and funds working relentlessly through the pandemic. As well as continued campaigning for improved conditions, equality, decimalization, and rights for sex workers, notable hardship funds are offering aid for sex workers during this crisis. In the UK the SWARM collective set up a funding page with recent donations going directly to sex workers in severe financial hardship, which has helped 100s of sex workers in the short term.

Across Thailand, large community efforts have been made to create food tables for those in desperate need of help. Many of these food and water stations have specifically targeted the red-light areas of Bangkok, Pattaya, and Phuket. Supported largely by the police, residents and local restaurants have been providing free meals and essentials, helping many of the sex workers hit hardest by this sudden, unexpected crisis.(6)

While there are strong hopes that, by the end of the year, we will see some resurrection of the sex work industry, we can’t expect things to be close to how they were at the same time last year.

Tanxxx, Bangkok, Escort

” I stayed in Bangkok as I needed to work. But I have not had many clients. Now I’m not able to earn money, and also not able to travel and be with my family… They are saying lockdowns will be over next month, but many people now have problems about money and work, I don’t think we will see many clients. I worry for my friends and others, some of them have already run out of money and are scared. It’s important we help each other during this time.”

When will the industry be back to normal?

At a time when people are unsure about what to expect in the next few weeks, it’s very hard to gage what the long-term future of sex work will be. It’s very easy to take a negative view, but while the short-term future of sex work is going to face some tough challenges, beyond that there are reasons to be positive.

The SESTA/FOSTA act was introduced in the U.S. in April of 2018, and was billed as a fight against sex trafficking. It was being watched closely by governments around the world, with some, including MPs in the U.K., pushing for localized versions. (7) In effect, the introduction of this bill (or rather 2 bills quickly cut and shut together), has closed down a number of the most influential platforms and forced many sex workers into more dangerous means of meeting clients. 2 years in, it’s already clear how ineffective and detrimental these laws have been. The current pandemic has only further highlighted the need for better technology and safer platforms as a way to tackle deep routed safety issue, not laws which drive more of the industry into the dark and widely unseen areas of society. (8) The importance of allowing people to work online, when possible, has never been so powerfully emphasised, as it has been during the fight against covid-19..

With so many groups and communities fighting against SESTA/FOSTA (not only for the harm it causes sex workers, but also for being anti-free speech and a worrying step in internet censorship), (9) other countries will be less keen to adopt the same approach, and there is now hope building that SESTA/FOSTA itself could be overturned in the U.S.. Just before the pandemic arrived, a group of sex workers and human rights activists won the right to appeal the law. It is due to be appealed in federal court once court systems are up and running again. (10)(11)

“even though sex workers create 4–10% of the GDP (in Thailand), sex workers are criminalized and left out of Labour Protection and Social Security.” (12 )

Often labelled as the world’s oldest profession, the industry has survived 2 world wars, countless natural disasters, and even some notable pandemics; such as the Black Death, which took over 200 million lives, and The Great Plague of London, which took 300 years to eradicate. The question should not be whether the industry will return, as it was, but rather, how can we use this pressing of the reset button to improve the safety, support, and rights of those within it.

As much as governments choose to ignore the issue, and sweep sex workers under the carpet in times of widespread woe, the sex work industry makes up a notable part of many GDPs. There are estimates that sex work accounts for between 0.43% to almost 4% of the national GDP in the UK, with similar figures often quoted for Spain and Italy, and in Thailand and the Philippines these estimates are as high as 10%. These are figures that are hardest to ignore when they are suddenly dwindling.

“COVID-19 shines a red light on sex workers’ lack of protection — our demands must be included” (13)

So often, after extraordinarily challenging circumstances, we grow closer and more accepting of each other. So often, after widespread catastrophes, comes social change. As economies and communities begin to rebuild and look at where things went wrong, and how we can make things better, for everyone, it’s important that the voices of sex workers are heard. Among those leading the voices of sex workers in Europe are The English Collective of Prostitutes (14) and Redlight Covid Europe (13) , who are pushing for 4 key demands, with growing hope they will be met:

Income substitution and housing support for sex workers.Moratorium on fines, raids, arrests and prosecutions.Mental and physical health services for those in sex work.A long term vision for the societal inclusion of sex workers: decriminalisation of sex work, economic reforms, and regularisation of migrants.

In any other industry these would not even be considered demands, but be basic human rights.

Hope in the Land of Smiles

In Thailand, where there are estimates of up to 2 million sex workers, a major breakthrough has been made. For the first time, sex workers are eligible for unemployment benefits, and have been included in the support and aid grants laid out in the country’s pandemic relief programme. This is a significant moment in the fight for sex worker rights and equality. Thai sex workers who suffered greatly in the 2004 Tsunami, and the 2011 floods, were not treated as a displaced workforce nor afforded this same level of acceptance, support, and recognition in a moment of

Liz Hilton, from Empower Thailand (12) , an NGO working to offer sex workers counselling, education, and career and life guidance, resiliently puts it.. now there is an “acceptance that the work we do is work,” and “if sex work can be recognized in a crisis, it has to be recognized outside of a crisis. There’s no going back.”

Sources and further reading:

(1) FOSTA/SESTA throws sex workers into the fire.

(2) Revolting prostitutes: The fight for sex workers’ rights.

(3) How Corona Virus is impacting the travel industry.

(4) The future of travel and tourism.

(5) Statement: Corona virus and sex worker demands.

(6) Thai restaurant owners donate food to people struggling financially.

(7) UK politician push for FOSTA SESTA style sex censorship.

(8) Stop SESTA/FOSTA.

(9) New SESTA laws threaten the future of the internet as we know it.

(10) Sex workers win major decision in federal court.

(11) Woodhull Foundation (fighting SESTA).

(12) The Empowerment Foundation.

(13) Redlight Covid Europe.

(14) The English Collective of Prostitutes.

(15) China’s hidden epidemic: Domestic violence.

How to Give Her an Orgasm With Mouth

Attention: Men all over the world! If you aren’t making your woman have an orgasm each and every single time your mouth touches her body, then you are doing something wrong.

Coming to stats, according to most studies, only between 30 and 50 percent of women can achieve orgasm through penetration alone. Even of those who can, the ones who come consistently through sex might be counted on the fingers.

And coming to orals, 80% of women can only have an orgasm through clitoral stimulation brought on by oral sex, this means that you need to master it mandatorily if you want to give her pleasure.

That said, the fact is that a lot of women are used to bad oral sex. Why? because most guys see oral sex as a brief pit stop en route, to the main destination, so they don’t put much energy into honing their skills. And if a man puts in a little more effort in orals, he will be miles ahead of the pack. There is something blissful about driving a woman crazy with just your hands and mouth and leave her doe-eyed and panting for more.

You should take pleasure in feeling her body tense up, in hearing her moan, and even in her taste and smell. And why not? She’s all heated up, and it’s because of what you’re doing to her. And with the right approach and technique, you will start feeling no less than a superman wielding an impressive assemblage of Krptonic superpowers which nobody else is having!!!

And here are some things to be taken care of to give her the kind of intense orgasms she’ll want you to repeat time and time again.

Start out slowly.

Good music never starts with the crescendo. It starts slowly, gradually gathering steam and finally ending up into a mind-blowing potpourri of musical notes. The female orgasm also works in the same way.

The slower you build, the more intense her orgasms will be. And just like it is for men, the more the person giving oral is truly into it, the hotter it is and the faster the recipient will likely hit climax. So, if you planning to go down her, act as if you have all the time in the world to give her a mind-blowing experience.

A common mistake men do is to just flick their tongue around inside her at lightning speed. This becomes uncomfortable for her. The trick is to keep your tongue in an up and down motion from the bottom of her labia to the clitoris and maintain a constant rhythm. Gradually increase the momentum. If she likes it, she will ask for it. And when you do get to the clitoris, start slowly. Tickle it with your tongue and slowly start to add more pressure until you find her sweet spot.

Remember to vary the tongue movements. A little trick can be trying out various alphabets (A, O, M for example) with the tongue slowly, gradually increasing the speed. She will soon tell you which alphabet she likes the most. Remember, gradually means over the course of several minutes, not seconds.

Use your hands.

Don’t be afraid to let your hands wander!

Move your hands all over her nipples, thighs, back, ass and even around her anal area. This will make her feel like you can’t get enough of her and she will naturally relax even more.

Once she is warmed up, it is time to use your fingers. Slowly insert one or two fingers inside her vagina while you suck on her clitoris. Gradually peel the labia folds with your softest fingers and make a ‘come here’ motion to stimulate her G-spot. If she does not like your fingers penetrating her, you can let your fingers linger and stroke around her entrance to take advantage of the massive amount of nerves there.

Both penetration and lingering are good and a combination of both works the best most of the time. This will soon get her thrashing around the bed in throes of multiple orgasms as your tongue and fingers move in harmony.

Just be sure your fingers are very clean and that you have filed down any rough nail edges.

Be consistent.

Consistency of speed is very important in oral sex. Do not give half-baked oral sex. Once you start, do not stop until she has an orgasm.

It is natural that, as she nears orgasm you may be tempted to up the ante and speed things up. This might prove to be an anti-climax. While every woman is unique, it is always best to stick to what you are doing at the same speed till her “almost there” moan converts to an earth-shattering orgasm. Resist the urge to go faster and faster and encourage her to relax and take her own time.

Do not put pressure on her to get the big O as fast as possible. Tell her how sexy she is and how much you enjoy going down on her. The key is to put her at ease so she can achieve it in style. Stay down there as long as it takes. Patience is sexy.

And you don’t have to stop at the first orgasm. One orgasm is great, but two is fantastic. Note that the clitoris can be very sensitive after climax so, don’t dive back in for Big O number two right away. Instead, focus on her other erogenous zones like her nipples, labia and rest of the vulva.

Once her clitoris has sufficiently recovered and soaked in all the emotions, circle it gradually for round 2 of orgasm. Remember there are no limits to a woman’s orgasm and the key only lies in making her feel relaxed and enjoying her experience.

Lastly, ask her what she wants.

A common theme throughout oral sex will be communication. And good communication goes well beyond moans and grunts (although even that is important).

The reason why most women get bad oral sex is that men frequently assume that their “tried-and-tested” method will work like a dream on any woman. It’s important to remember that every woman (and body) likes different sensations, rhythms, and positions when it comes to oral sex. For her to reach her orgasmic potential, a woman has to be able to tell you what feels good and what feels REALLY good. The difference can often be as small as moving a few millimeters of pressure to the left or applying just a wee bit more fingering.

And men need to be curious and open to actually ask a woman what she wants or likes. Great oral also requires your tongue to talk and not just lick her. An honest open conversation with her not only takes care of her sexual experience but also makes sex unique and fun to do.

Remember, every woman is different, so there’s no ‘right way’ to do it, other than the way she enjoys. So, gradually keep improvising yourself and meander blissfully, soaking in the excitement of the moment, till you get it right.

Conclusion

Learn those tips above right? Then let get started in the best adult escort platform now! Whether you are looking for a long-term relationship or just one night stand, we are confident that Geylang666 can help you achieve your sexual goals. So, take some time to explore and connect with our members and call the escort girl today!

Give Her the Most Intense Orgasm of Her Life

I am not dating anyone right now, and that’s fine. But what I do miss about dating is this triple pleasure experience that I call the Triple Whammy. It’s kind of hard to do it to yourself — a partner really is necessary for this one because, alas, we only have two hands.

Anyhow, this is something that a girlfriend first did to me. But when I date guys I show them also. I, like many women, do not have vaginal orgasms during intercourse. Yes, I can use my hand, but guys are always like “Did I make you cum, did I make you cum,” like it’s some test of their manhood.

“Look,” I will say to them, “If you are serious about my orgasm, and not just as some proof of your own masculinity, I will show you how to make a woman cum like she’s never cum before. Are you interested?”

They always say they are. But some men really all talk and they don’t really give a shit about helping you have an intense orgasm if there’s nothing in it for them. But of course, there is something in it for them. It can be a real turn-on for men if they can get over the idea that they have to be orgasming too in order to have fun.

The Triple Stimulation Method

1. On the clitoris.

I use a suction vibrator on my self. But that’s because I am used to the powerful mega-orgasm of the triple method and I can handle it. When I first started I used a regular bullet vibrator on my clit, because it was too overwhelming to have one of these suction vibrators stimulating me so powerfully while I was also being stimulated in two other areas, as we will see.

If you think you can handle it, by all means, start out with a suction vibrator. If not, use the regular. The main thing I guess is that you have to be OK with using a vibrator on yourself with a partner present. Especially if it is a guy, some women are not comfortable with this.

Get comfortable with it.

It’s worth it, really. I have tried the triple method just using my hand on the clit, and it’s not the same mind-blowing orgasm that puts you in another dimension.

2. G-spot stimulation.

While I am using the vibrator on my clit, I like my partner to just insert two fingers into my vagina and press upward, exerting steady pressure on the g-spot. I don’t like him or her to “fuck” my vagina with their fingers — it’s not necessary. They can just press on the g-spot, curl the fingers back and forth, or move them side to side, but there’s no point in penetrating any further because then the fingers will move past the g-spot.

I have also had my partner use a g-spot stimulating vibrator for this part of the triple whammy. I found this to be too much, but you might enjoy it, especially if your partner is a guy who isn’t too swift about finding your g-spot — this might be the way to go. These g-spot vibrators are bent up so that you really can’t miss the g-spot when you stick it in — even a dummy can do it!

3. A skinny vibrator or dildo up the butt.

It really doesn’t have to vibrate. The point is to penetrate the butt as the other two places are being pleasured so that you really go over the edge into that realm of “hyper-stimulation.”

This one I do think it’s better to push it slowly in and slowly out. It’s all about the sensation of the vibrator entering the sphincter. If you just hold the dildo in your ass, the sphincter sensations will dissipate. Slowly fuck the ass, deeper and deeper, until you get the slim vibrator all the way in.

When I orgasm in this method, my sphincter does spasms like crazy on the dildo or vibrator. It’s so wonderful.

Of course, a little bit of lube will help, but if you’re like me, your pussy will be positively dripping from the first two stimulations, so that your partner can just use some of that to pave the way for the anal.

Also, your partner can use a finger, or two. But that’s kind of tough to get right. I think the best size for this would be one and a half-fingers, which of course nobody has. There are vibrators that are just this size — not too big, not too small.

So if you do the Goldilocks test and you find just the right vibrator for your butt, you can give this to your partner and not worry about them hurting you or not being able to feel them.

It’s helpful to have a pillow under your butt to give your partner access but it is not necessary. I have done it flat on the sheets.

4. Make it a quadruple whammy.

As my three areas are being pleasured, I take the hand that is not using the vibrator and I caress and pinch my nipples with it. I find this increases the fireworks. I always do that when I masturbate anyway, but it’s even more intense during the Triple Whammy. The brain is already so overwhelmed trying to locate these three points of stimulus that when you add a forth it sends you to the next level of transcendence. I have a fantasy of having two more people present — women, preferably — one who is sucking my toes and the other who is kissing and breathing in my ears. I think this might actually kill me — my furnace might explode and I would spontaneously combust.

What is it Like?

Well, hopefully, you will find out for yourself. But this has been my experience. The first intense orgasm comes fairly quickly after all three spots are engaged. A couple of pokes up the butt and I am really ready to cum. As the vibrator brings my clit to the clitoral orgasm, and the g-spot stimulator adds that to the mix, the pressure in the butt sends this intense orgasm so far over the edge you will not believe it at first.

A long, deep, deep, explosion of pleasure will flood your brain, and you might feel like you’ve left this reality — I did the first time. The depth of the orgasm was crater-sized — and I totally fell in, head over heels, losing track of time and space and just sort of blessing.

Keep going.

The next orgasm will be twice as powerful. And the third will be four times as powerful. You should have the music up really loud because by the fourth orgasm I guarantee you will be screaming your head off and you don’t want the police showing up at your house — that will totally ruin your Triple Whammy.

Reciprocating

What do you give to the person who just showed you the face of God? If it’s a guy, I usually show my thanks by giving him a good blowjob to climax. After all, I don’t need to be fucked any more — I’ve just been fucked to high heaven. I think this is a good time to do some prostate stimulation during the blow job, with a prostate-stimulating dildo or just your finger. He will be more open to this sometimes confronting but always pleasurable experience having just been so up your butt.

If it’s a girl, simple, I give her the Triple Whammy in return. And then we both sleep for about fifteen hours — the sleep of the just!

Conclusion

If you’re looking for an exciting sexual experience, now is the perfect time to visit our escorts Singapore to find your best sex partner tonight!

How to Rock Her World in Bed

Sex is weird. It’s one of those rare topics where we all know exactly what we want, but very few are willing to say it. Generally speaking, one person is walking away displeased and annoyed (insert woman here). While the other feels like everything was great (insert man here). So I’m here to represent all the women in stating how to rock her world in bed:

1. We don’t like your “moves”

We know you think you’re the king of PornHub, but your moves are played out more than a top 5 billboard hit. Why are you the person making all the decisions on what we do and how we do it?

Meanwhile, you awkwardly flip us to positions that do nothing for us. The silence is not enjoyment. The fake sounds are simply being polite, you know, we do have manners. It’s equally as embarrassing for us to have to offend your manhood.

All the while we are now counting, “ One Mississippi, Two Mississippi” in our heads as we wait in eager anticipation for the end. We should all have an equal say in what we want here. The moral is, ask what we like, let us have an equal say in the play by play if you will. You might even learn a thing or two.. oops.

2. Kissing matters. (You might want to learn how to do that)

We’ve all been in an awkward kissing situation. One person is inserting a tongue while moving it to the tune of the alphabet. The other person is more or less “nibbling”, I’ll call it. No one is on the same page, especially the alphabet boy. I know you learned the “alphabet tongue mouth dance” from a Boy Meets World episode or maybe even Cheers per your generation- but stop. Just stop. Mutuality in kissing matters too. A bad kiss is a sign of more bad physical interactions to come.

3. Hey, douche, go to the gym

We wouldn’t mind if you went to the gym too. I am a “guys girl” and worked with mostly men for most of my career. I get the scoop. Most men have a request list for women that is a mile long. The request list goes something like: 90 % physical attribute request, and 10% of anything that should matter. That’s cool. I get it hot girls are hot. But let’s be real: are YOU worthy of the hot girl? Dude, are you even hot? I hear you critiquing her body, “She’s too wide”, “She’s too big”, “She’s too flat”…and on we go. Excuse me, sir, have you looked in the mirror lately? When is the last time your fat ass made it to the gym? A little stamina in the bedroom wouldn’t kill you either.

4. Don’t overcompensate for your package

Your package. Where should I begin? The most relevant point here has to be there is no need to exaggerate in this department. I can’t tell you the numerous times I’ve heard stories about a guy bragging until the end. Sir, in about .5 seconds we’re going to see there is no “anaconda” under those boxers. Now is the time to hope you’ve done everything else right so this matters less. The way you guys lie about your package is the same crime as women with the extra padded bra. No one leaves happy.

7. Foreplay isn’t only in the bedroom

Men why are you always ready to go right in for the kill? Why is your only skill relegated to “inserting”? Not cool fellas. Not cool at all. Foreplay does not have to be only the interactions that take place right before the “insert”. If you can master touch you may have mastered everything. There is little better than being at a table, sitting across from someone that can arouse you better than you’ve been aroused in bed.. right there in public. While you might not be able to rip our clothes off right then and there you can almost guarantee something steamy later.

8. Have sex with our minds first. Please and thank you

The best sex you’ve ever had wasn’t something that quickly happened at the moment. It did not start and end and that was that. The best sex of our lives always begins when the minds meet and find themselves pleasing each other first. By this, I mean, we don’t want to be treated like meat. We want more and the more makes the sex more fulfilling in all aspects. Find out how our day was. Find out what we like. Then show us you were listening. A good recall is an easy score. A happy woman makes a happy bedroom experience for you, and us!

9. Dance and sex are pretty similar

We aren’t looking for boy band choreographed moves. However, please learn a basic two-step to the beat of a standard song in your girl’s favorite genre. When the beat hits and you should’ve moved to the left, but find yourself on an uptick to the right. Sir, that is not a good place to be. A basic to step is on your most immediate to-do list. Bad dancing only foreshadows other bad moves to come.

10. Hey, fellas, it’s not all about you

It’s not all about your need to get laid. It’s not all about your latest fantasy. It’s about us too.

 

Conclusion

Are you looking for a way to relax and unwind? We would like to share a great platform in Singapore, Geylang666, which is one of the trusted and safety adult escort in Singapore. So, let’s book your appointment today and let us help you feel your best.